I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This: 18 Assurances on Grief

New York Times and international bestselling mystery author Clare Mackintosh makes her nonfiction debut with this deeply felt memoir of unfathomable loss, and infinite hope.

"Grief has run through my life like thread through fabric; at times gossamer-thin and barely there, other times weaving thick, clumsy darns across the rips. In my grief I am a mother, a child, a sister, a wife, a woman, a friend. I am also a writer."

When Clare Mackintosh lost her five-week-old son, she soon discovered there are no neat, labeled stages of grief like so many books insist. The shape of each loss is different; when a parent, relative, or friend passes, we grieve the person in all their beauty, their humanity, their imperfections. For Clare, there was no preparing for the anger and excruciating ache of knowing her child's life would remain unlived. This is the book she needed then.

Inspired by a viral Twitter thread Clare wrote on the anniversary of her son's death, this deeply honest, compassionate memoir will bring solace and encouragement to anyone who finds themselves walking with grief, whether for a season or for several years. It is for those who need a little voice saying: I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This, for the people who love them, and those who understand that great loss can be a window through which we see how powerful, and unending, love can be.

Clare Mackintosh is a former police officer and a multi-award-winning author. Translated into forty languages, her books have sold more than two million copies worldwide and have been New York Times and international bestsellers. Mackintosh has spoken on television and radio about the death of her son and the themes of grief and healing, which consequently appear in her novels. She lives in North Wales with her family and can be found at claremackintosh.com, or on Instagram and Facebook at @ClareMackWrites