Hallow - Paperback

From foster care to homelessness, from trauma to triumph-a raw, unflinching memoir of survival against impossible odds.

Nicholas Michael Matiz was supposed to disappear. The system designed to protect him failed at every turn. Bounced between an abusive father and an addicted mother, thrust into foster homes where new horrors awaited, and ultimately abandoned to navigate the streets alone, his story should have ended in statistics-another broken child swallowed by drugs, prison, or an early grave.

It didn't.

Hallow is not just another trauma memoir. It's a visceral journey through the darkest corners of childhood abuse, sexual violence, institutional neglect, and the brutal reality of youth homelessness. Matiz writes with unflinching honesty about being raped by a stepbrother at nine years old, about sleeping in cars and shelter beds, about the soul-crushing weight of having nowhere to call home and no one who gives a damn if you live or die.

But this isn't poverty porn or misery tourism. This is the story of a young man who refused to let his abusers have the final word on who he would become.

With prose that cuts like broken glass and moments of unexpected beauty amid the wreckage, Matiz documents his fight not just for survival but for dignity, connection, and purpose. From producing underground films in youth shelters to falling in love in rain-soaked park benches, from the gutting betrayal of supposed family to finding chosen family in the most unlikely places-this memoir captures both the savage reality of trauma and the stubborn persistence of hope.

Matiz doesn't offer easy answers or inspirational platitudes. He doesn't pretend the damage isn't real or that healing follows a tidy arc. Instead, he presents his truth with all its jagged edges intact: sometimes you have to lose everything-repeatedly-before you can build something that can't be taken away.

Raw, gritty, and ultimately defiant, Hallow challenges readers to bear witness to experiences most would rather ignore, while offering testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of telling your own story-on your own terms.