2020: My Last Hope - Paperback

Since 2018, Ensign's life had become an unimaginable whirlwind of chaos. Each year became farther removed from anything he had ever known or imagined. Ensign was truly alive, living each moment in hedonistic chaos. Drug use increased, his mental state slipped, and Ensign embraced a life unfamiliar.

Ensign was homeless as 2020 began. His situation became far more urgent as the year progressed...yet his life was amazing. He was truly living every day. Ensign's adventure; amazing, tragic, wonderful, and terrifying, continued to snowball out of control. His focus; finding himself, and a purpose, through travel and interaction with others.
Ensign warily arrived back in Michigan in early 2020. He knew he only had a certain amount of time to make it out. Ensign's business in the Midwest was coming to a close. He wanted out of the drug scene. He had seen too much; he had done too much.

Ensign had no intentions of quitting crystal, but the stress from the drug game was too much. He had a plan. Ensign was going to switch from distribution to a personal supply. The drugs were going to fuel him on a cross country trip to start over. Through his adult media popularity, Ensign had many places to go. The country was his for the taking...or so he thought. Leaving the drug underworld wasn't as simple as Ensign hoped.

Out West, in unfamiliar territory, Ensign encountered a situation; one which lasted through the warm months of summer. Colorado became his home in a very unconventional way. The drugs kept flowing, the high-level internet hookup culture dragged Ensign along as he tried to get back on track.

Life only became more chaotic as fall and winter became Ensign's backdrop in late 2020. Ensign checked off all but two states on his travel list. Drugs and intimacy continued to consume Ensign as he was far into a midlife crisis; one which had no end in sight.